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Sarcastic Birthday Cards

67 products
  • Official
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • I had no idea Humans lived this long. (Well Done.)
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Just think. If you were born on any other day of the year, you wouldn't be getting this card today. (You're welcome.)
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Thinking of you (in a totally non-creepy way) on your birthday.
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Happy 1.69th Birthday (on Saturn)
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Because your birthday is at Christmas time, I got you this card now (even though your Birthday is ages away) to wish you a Happy Birthday! (In case I don't see you on the day.)
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Everything Will End Birthday Card
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Time Will Win, You Will Lose. 'Happy' Birthday.
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • It gets to the point where you just stop counting, you know? (Probably because we all lost count ages ago.)
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • I was going to get you a funny card, but then I remembered. You don't have a sense of humour.
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Hope you have a wonderful thing
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • It's your Birthday. Big Whoop. So what, you want a card or something?
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Happy 3/4 of a Century!
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • You are now closer to turning seventy than you are to your own birth.
    £1.99
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  • Do you realise how difficult it is to find a Birthday card that isn't offensive for someone as old as you?
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Let the slow clap begin
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • Wheel
    £1.99
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  • Looks like the average age of the human population just went up a notch or two. I'm blaming you.
    £1.99
    £1.99
  • I can't believe I know an Eighty Year Old.
    £1.99
    £1.99